//She got out of town, railway New York bound
Took all except my name, another alien on Broadway//

Fear.

It had driven her to do many things in her life. Runaway from home, snort cocaine, marry Eddie, divorce him, and turn her life around. Staring at the recently packed Tahoe, she knew fear was driving her toward yet another new situation—new town, new job, new memories to replace the ones scattered at her feet. They ground underneath the heels of her boots, shattering on the hot, black Las Vegas pavement.

Tears slipping down her cheeks, Catherine slammed the trunk shut and hastily wiped them away. But they did not cease, streaking down her face, and smudging her haphazardly applied make-up. The bright lights of the night wept for her. For the dead, and the dying, and the lost souls that danced in the streets until the first rays of light spilled over the mountains.

//Some things in this world... they just don’t change
Some things you can’t see until it’s too late//

"Damn him." She mumbled, head in her hands, letting her blonde hair fall in front of her eyes like a mask. Even in death, he plagued her thoughts, lace teddies and nights of pure sexual passion dancing in front of her eyes.

//Baby, baby, baby, when all your love is gone
Who will save me from all I’m up against out in this world//

She was no longer Catherine Willows. That name had been shed the moment she’d gotten the phone call...the very second Grissom had uttered those three life changing words, "Cath, he’s gone".

Though she’d divorced the man whose name she had kept...a part of him, of that life, had always remained within her. The name a way to remind her of her past, the only shred of her previous existence left...the string that kept her from being completely alone in the world.

Eddie Willows.

//Maybe, maybe, maybe, you’ll find something that’s enough to please you
But if the bright lights don’t receive you//

He’d remained in her for so long, she hardly knew how to get rid of him, of his memory. What was she now? Not Catherine of Montana, or innocent Catherine, as she had been dubbed upon her first arrival in Vegas, by her new employer. No longer divorced Catherine, or Junkie Catherine, or even stripper Catherine. As much as she wanted to believe that she was a completely different person from what she was 15 years ago, inside herself, she’d never let go of the image of the bright, blue-eyed Seventeen year old. The one that had come to Vegas filled with hope, only to have it obliterated by the drugs, money, and bright lights of the Vegas strip.

No longer could she define herself by her past. Her last link, her only tie to what she once was, was gone. So, who was she now?

//You can turn yourself around,
and come on home//