David Hodges was not really very Christmassy. He didn't really believe in the saying 'goodwill to all men' and he didn't believe in the insanity of the season.

But one thing that David Hodges was more than happy to believe in was alcohol.

Which is why he could be found in the lab, simmering wassail over the Bunsen burner. He loved the smell of wassail cooking, and he saw no reason why he couldn't put the burner to good use.

Gil Grissom stood in the doorway, watching this practice with bemusement. Sure, he'd cooked a pickle on lab equipment in college, but he'd never thought of cooking wassail on a burner. He adjusted his glasses and sighed. Next thing he knew, there'd be chestnuts roasting over the burner.

He felt that he couldn't complain, since Catherine had warned him that things were going to go a little bit crazy in the lead-up to Christmas. She'd even told him that she'd be wearing something special tonight after work.

Then again, he'd normally prefer her naked, but he had to admit that his curiosity was piqued at this notion of something special.

Gil walked along to the break room, where his faithful team of CSIs were gathered, awaiting the evening's assignments. Catherine crossed her legs in front of him, and he glared at her. That wasn't fair.

"As we all know, with Christmas rapidly approaching, our cases get a little more outlandish." Gil took a deep breath. "Nick, you're working a 419. Possible murder by reindeer."

Nick blinked. "WHAT?" He groaned. "Why do I get these cases?"

Sara smiled sweetly at him. "Because you work well with animals."

"Sara, you have a case with an elf. He's claiming sexual abuse."

Nick now turned and smirked at Sara. "Payback."

"Grissom, an elf?"

"Tis the season," Catherine muttered.

"Warrick, you have a brawl at a live nativity. Something about Mary being pregnant and it not being an Immaculate Conception."

Warrick sighed. "Only in Vegas."

"Catherine, you and I are on the lab tonight and Greg." Gil peered over his glasses and surveyed the room. "Where is Greg?"

There was a strange tinkling sound and they all turned to look at the door. Greg stood there, wearing a green and red elf outfit, including a red cap and green shoes with bells on the toes.

"You've got to be kidding me." Sara's jaw dropped.

"Look, I know you all have some weird ass thing about Christmas and most of you wonder around like robots during the festive season, but not this year!" His foot started to tap, and he crossed his arms, glaring at him. "It is Christmas and we are going to have fun!"

"Greg, are you on drugs?" Catherine asked calmly. "Or do you need to be remedicated somehow?"

"Don't encourage him," Gil berated her. "Alright, you all have your assignments. Let's go."

--

Catherine let out a long moan, feeling her body tighten in response to the deep kiss that Gil was bestowing on her. "Mmm, Gil.I thought we were supposed to be doing paperwork."

"It's your fault," he whispered in her ear. "Promising me about something you're going to wear later. And then crossing your legs in front of me in the break room. You drive me crazy, Catherine."

She let her hand fall between them and a slow smirk appeared on her face when she realized that he had a raging erection. "Gil.that for me?"

He kissed her again, long and hard. As she pushed her body against his, he snaked a hand down into her pants, and grinned when he found her hot and wet. "Cath.that for me?"

Catherine closed her eyes as he tenderly touched her heat. When he pressed a finger to her clit and pressed down, she moaned and arched towards him.

"Here, Cath?"

Biting her lip, Catherine pulled back. "No, not yet." She kissed him tenderly. "Later."

Gil groaned as he watched her saunter out the door. She was going to kill him.

--

Warrick approached the live nativity scene with caution. Or at least, what had been the live nativity scene. Mangers and props were tipped over and hay was strewn everywhere. He looked up as Vartannn strode over to him.

"What the hell happened?" Warrick asked.

Vartannn sighed. "Mary announced she was pregnant."

"Yeah, Grissom mentioned it wasn't the Immaculate Conception."

"You could say that. The minute she announced it, the three wise men, two shepherds and Joseph claimed to be dad. The angel Gabriel is the guy she's dating."

Warrick blinked and stared at Vartannn. "You've got to be kidding me."

"So naturally things broke out into a brawl. Mary's inside being consoled by the vicar, and we've managed to get the guys under control."

"Great. Nativity scene gone wrong."

Warrick walked over to the church where the brawling men had been quieted down and sequestered in pews. He did a head count, finding three wise men, two shepherds and Joseph, just as Vartannn said. Warrick made his way over to Joseph.

"Hi, I'm Warrick Brown with the forensics lab."

Joseph looked up at him. "Forensics lab? Are you going to find out who's the father?"

Warrick couldn't imagine a job he'd like less. "No, sir, we're just here to take evidence. About the brawl."

"Why? No one's dead."

"Thank God." Warrick heard a gasp and saw the vicar staring at him. He bit his lip. "Sorry, padre."

"We're supposed to be married! And I find out she's sleeping with three wise men, two shepherds and the angel Gabriel!"

Warrick couldn't remember the last time he'd ever heard anything so ridiculous. "Hold out your hands please, sir."

--

Nick made his way over to the crime scene, thinking that it brought a whole new meaning to the song 'Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer'. He found Detective O'Reilly standing by a reindeer and Nick sighed.

"What's happening, O'Reilly?"

"The reindeer killed an elf. We think."

"You think?"

"No witnesses. Apart from the reindeer." O'Reilly gestured to a man standing to one side. "He's the owner of the reindeer. He found the body and called 911."

Nick made his way over to the body. The man was in his thirties and wearing the standard elf costume. He shook his head and walked over to the other man. "Sir? My name is Nick Stokes, I'm with the Las Vegas Crime Lab."

"Michael Clarke." The man looked nervous and fidgety.

"Can you tell me what happened here?"

"Well, I'm not really sure." Mr. Clarke scratched his head. "See, I breed reindeer, and I supply them to those that want them. Around this time of year, business is pretty busy. I was supposed to meet a guy here who was going to pick up Bucky."

Nick gestured to the reindeer who was in a pen. "That's Bucky?"

Mr. Clarke nodded. "Anyway, my daughter broke her arm, so I had to take her to the emergency room. So I left a message on his cell phone and when I came back, I found the guy dead and Bucky standing over the dead guy."

"Right." Nick looked over at the reindeer. It was going to be a long night.

--

Sara looked up as Detective Vega came to her car. "Hey, Vega. I thought Brass had this one?"

Vega tried not to laugh. "He did. But.something came up."

She lifted an eyebrow. "Ookay then. So, what's going on?"

The cop gestured over to a small group of people. "Santa, Mrs. Claus and two of the three elves. One of the other elves is claiming Mrs. Claus sexually harassed him and then sexually assaulted him."

Sara glanced over at the group and then she turned back to Vega. "You said two out of three. Where's the third elf?"

She felt a sharp pain in her foot and looked down as a dwarf stared up at her angrily.

"I'm right here, you stupid woman! For god's sakes, doesn't anyone pay attention in this joint!?"

Sara's eyes widened. "Did you just step on my foot?"

Two uniformed officers ran over to the CSI and cop. "Sorry, Detective Vega. He got away from us."

Sara tried not to appear amused at this notion, but she knew she had failed when the elf jumped on her foot again. "Hey!"

Vega glared at the elf. "Mr. Jingles, if you can't control yourself, I'll have to cuff you."

"Cuff me? I'm the victim here!"

Sara blinked. "Jingles?"

"Yeah." The elf turned to look at Sara, hands on his hips. "You got a problem with that, lady?"

"Excuse me!" Mrs. Claus was calling out. "When can we get out of here? I have places to be."

"I bet you do," the elf growled. "More elves to sexually harass and to touch inappropriately?"

"Oh geez," Vega rubbed his face. "Sara?"

Sara blinked. "Bring them down to interrogation. I'll take their statements."

--

Greg jingled his way down the halls of the CSI labs, a plate of Christmas cookies in his hand. Catherine was also walking down the hallway and she smiled at the excited man.

"Hey, Greg. I didn't know you baked."

"Sometimes I do," came Greg's reply. "But I have to admit that these aren't mine. My girlfriend made them. She just dropped them by." He looked excited. "We're still going to have the Christmas party tonight, right?"

Catherine had no idea what he was talking about. "Uh, sure, okay."

Greg grinned. "Excellent. I'll make sure she's here. And I think Hodges is cooking wassail in the lab."

She watched him jingle his way down the corridor before what he had said really sunk in. "Hodges is doing what?"

--

"This is not amusing."

Sofia bit her lip as she tightened the belt around Jim's waist. "It is a little funny."

"Maybe for you. All you have to do is wear a little red dress. Which, by the way, looks good on you." Jim Brass gave her a small grin.

"Thank you." She smiled back and then handed him the white beard. "Here you go."

He looked at the beard and frowned. "Oh come on."

Sofia glared at him. "You were the one who made the bet with the other cops. And you were the one who got us sucked into wearing these ridiculous outfits. So come on, Santa. Buck up."

Jim sighed and put the beard on. "There."

"See? It wasn't that painful."

"No, the pain will come when we leave this room."

"Just take a deep breath," Sofia assured him. "It'll all be over by the end of tonight."

--

"Gil?"

Gil looked up from his desk, smiling broadly when he saw Catherine standing in the doorway. "Hi, beautiful. Want to join me?"

She smiled back at him, making her way into the room and shutting the door behind her. "I'm always happy to join you, Gil."

"And join with me, right?" He smirked at her.

Catherine rolled her eyes. "God, Gil, that was so corny." She leant over and pressed a tender kiss to his lips. "But yes, I love joining with you."

"And to what do I owe this pleasure?" he asked, beckoning her to move closer.

She was more than happy to do so, and settled herself in his lap, resting her head on his shoulder. "Hmm, apart from this?"

"This is definitely a pleasure," he replied, kissing the top of her head.

"Did you know the lab is having a Christmas party tonight?"

Gil paused. "We are?"

"According to Greg we are."

"Greg's word is often suspect."

"True, but when Greg says there's going to be a party, there usually is. Besides, he's wearing that elf costume."

"I thought that was just Greg being ridiculous."

"Sometimes there is method to his madness."

"Apparently." Gil tightened his arms around her. "Are we going to this party?"

"I think people might notice if we weren't there."

"Pity. I was starting to get all hot and bothered about the outfit you promised me tonight."

"Hmm." Catherine kissed him again. "Maybe I'll have to bring it out early." She deftly hopped out of his arms. "See you later."

Gil watched her leave, still pondering over her last statement. She was going to be naked earlier? Surely not.

--

Warrick walked up to the window at the waiting room in the LVPD. He took a deep breath, watching as the cops tried to organize the wise men, the shepherds, Joseph, the angel Gabriel and Mary into a relatively calm group.

He watched them argue for a while, and was about to go in when Vartannn came to stand beside him.

"So what's going on in there?" Warrick asked the detective.

"Well, at the moment they're all shouting restraining orders. Mary wants nothing to do with any of them, the angel Gabriel is calling sexual harassment and Joseph says that one of the shepherds insisted he was gay."

"Yeah, well now he's one confused shepherd."

"No kidding," Vartannn muttered. "So, what's the plan? Something tells me that no judge is going to issue restraining orders to members of the first nativity."

"Yeah, picture that," Warrick chuckled. "Let's get Mary into a room first. Considering all this is about her."

Vartannn nodded. "No problem."

--

Gil walked out of his office, intent on finding Greg and perhaps an explanation as to what all the party talk was about. He stopped dead when he saw Nick walking down the corridor - with a reindeer beside him.

Gil took his glasses off, rubbed his tired eyes and put them back on again. Yes, the reindeer was still there. "Uh, Nick?"

Nick looked up at the older man. "Hey, Griss."

"Nick, what are you doing with a reindeer in the lab?"

"He's being accused of murder." Nick paused, realizing how strange that sounded. "I think."

Gil opened his mouth and closed it again, deciding this was probably not an avenue he wanted to go down. "Uh, okay. Keep up the good work, Nick."

Nick led the reindeer past, heading for one of the evidence rooms. The reindeer simply stood in the room, not moving. Nick glanced at the nail clippers he had brought with him.

"I think I need to call in Animal Control."

--

Sara sat opposite Mr. Jingles, glaring at the man as much as he glared at her. "Mr. Jingles, you say that Mrs. Claus sexually harassed you."

"And sexually assaulted me. Don't forget that."

"Right. Could you tell us exactly what happened?"

Mr. Jingles narrowed his eyes. "Why?"

"We need to know the facts, Mr. Jingles," Vega muttered.

The elf glared at Vega before returning his gaze to Sara. "She made several lewd comments to me."

"Could you elaborate please?"

"That's none of your business."

Sara felt like slamming her head on the desk.

--

"Greg."

Greg Sanders froze as he made himself a cup of coffee. "Yes, Mr. Grissom, sir?"

"Catherine tells me that there's a party tonight."

"Party? Here? What party?"

"Greg."

"It wasn't my idea. It was Hodges."

Gil lifted an eyebrow. "Hodges decided the lab was going to have a party."

"Yes?"

Gil sighed. "Does Ecklie know?"

Greg shook his head.

"Fine. Just.try not to go overboard."

Greg lifted an eyebrow. He'd thought Grissom would have turned the entire idea down flat. "Uh, sure."

Gil left the room, intent on finding Catherine. He passed by Nick and his reindeer, and he barely blinked an eyelid as he passed Sofia wearing some sort of Christmas outfit. When he couldn't find Catherine, he felt frustrated, and headed back to his office. After closing the door behind him, he turned towards his desk, and his eyes nearly popped out of his head.

Perched on his desk, one leg crossed over the other, sat Catherine Willows. She wore a long-sleeved red leotard, the ends of the sleeves trimmed with white fur. Over the leotard was a short red skirt, the kind that twirled, hemmed with more of the white fur. She had red high-heels on and a Santa hat was perched atop her flowing strawberry-blonde hair.

"Ho, ho, ho," she smiled.

Gil tried to get his voice back, and eventually he took a deep breath. "Holy.Jesus, Catherine. You look stunning."

Catherine grinned, uncrossing her legs and slipping off the desk. "Glad you think so. I hope you don't mind getting your surprise early."

"Are you kidding? As long as that outfit doesn't give me a heart attack by the end of the night, you can wear it for as long as you want!"

She rolled her eyes, walking over to him. "I had a feeling that would be your response."

"Catherine, you know me. I think you look sexy in anything."

Her arms wound around his neck. "Gil.kiss me."

"Gladly," he replied, his lips crashing down on hers.

The kiss was long and deep, and Catherine smirked into the kiss as she felt Gil's hands slip underneath the skirt and over her tush encased in the leotard.

"Like that, huh?" she whispered as the kiss broke.

"Mmm, I'd like it better if it was all bare down there." Gil kissed her neck.

"Gil Grissom! Do you really think I'd go bare down there at work?"

He pouted. "What about for my birthday?"

"We'll see," came the reply. "Now quit with the feeling me up. I have work to do."

His eyes widened. "You're going out of my office - in that?"

"I have work to do, Gil. I can't stay in here all night."

"Why not? I can bring your work to you." Gil folded his arms. "You are not going out into the lab dressed like that."

She lifted an eyebrow. "Since when did you become a hee-haw caveman?"

"Did you just call me a hee-haw caveman?"

"Only because you're acting like one. With your, 'You can't go out there"."

"But you're dressed like that."

"Gil, it's hardly going to inspire anyone to haul me off and ravish me."

He looked at her pointedly.

Catherine blushed. "Oh, right." She leant up and kissed him. "Don't worry, Gil. The only man I will let ravish me is you."

Gil took a deep breath. "Okay. But if Greg makes any comments."

Catherine smiled widely. "I'll send him to you."

--

"Can I have a coffee?" Mary sighed, staring at Warrick.

Warrick glanced at Vartannn, who nodded and spoke to an officer.

"So, Ms."

"Please, just call me Mary. This whole situation is getting out of hand."

"Right, well, Mary, we need to get to the bottom of this brawl."

Mary shrugged. "What can I say? They're all just men."

Neither Warrick nor Vartannn were sure how to respond to that. Bravely, Warrick forged on.

"We need to find out who started the brawl."

"How the hell should I know? One minute we're standing there in the nativity play, and the next, most of the participants are acting like a bunch of animals!" Mary paused. "No, wait. Most of the live animals in the set were better behaved."

"From what we've been able to ascertain, Mary, is that many of the participants are claiming to be the father of your child," Vartann explained.

She lifted an eyebrow. "You don't seriously expect me to tell them which one it is, do you?"

Warrick decided he'd tread down that avenue of questioning. "Why not?"

"I've got a ton of guys swooning over me, fighting over me, willing to do anything for me. Why would I want to stop them from doing that?"

Neither the CSI nor the detective had any answer to that.

"I think that's all we'll need from you now," Warrick finally said. "Thanks for your time."

Mary nodded and left the room, searching for the officer who had assured her that she'd have some coffee. Warrick and Vartann sat back in their chairs, staring at each other.

"So," Vartann eventually said.

"So, she knows what the brawl was about. And she knows which one is the dad." Warrick paused. "I think."

"I'm still confused."

"Yeah, me too." Warrick stood up. "I think we better go and interview some of the other nativity players."

--

Nick glanced at the woman, who stared at him expectantly.

"You seriously want me to clip Bucky's toenails?"

Animal Control Officer Laura Brady just stared at him for a moment. "I thought you were the one who said you could get evidence from his toenails."

"Well yeah.but I thought you would be doing the clipping."

Laura lifted an eyebrow. "Wouldn't that interrupt the chain of custody?"

Nick stood up. "Look, Laura, I'm going to be honest with you. I really, really don't want to touch a reindeer's toenails."

Laura folded her arms. "You're kidding me. You work all types of crap, and you won't touch a reindeer?"

Nick shrugged.

"Just do it." Laura handed over the nail clippers.

--

"Ms. Goldman."

"Call me Mrs. Claus."

Sara looked at the woman opposite her with disbelief. "Uh, okay, Mrs Claus."

O'Riley shifted in his seat.

"Ms. Claus, Mr. Jingles is of the opinion that you've been sexually harassing him."

"Why in God's good name would I ever want to do that?" Ms. Claus looked incredulous. "I get plenty of good loving from my man and let me tell you this.he ain't no midget."

Sara's eyes widened but she soon composed herself. "So you're denying the allegations."

"You bet your skinny ass I am! How dare that little bastard say I sexually harassed him. Don't he think I got better things to do with my time!"

O'Riley looked at Sara pleadingly. She nodded and told Ms. Claus that she could leave.

--

Greg was decorating the break room with as many Christmas decorations as he could. His girlfriend was helping him, handing things up to him.

"You know, I could get them and you could work on something else," Greg suggested.

She grinned. "Let me put it this way, Elf Boy - I like watching your butt wiggle as you put the decorations up."

Greg thought about that for a few minutes. "Right. Keep at it then."

Hodges made his way into the room, a Bunsen Burner and a saucepan in his hand. "Here's the wassail. Keep stirring it. If it's ruined, it's your fault."

"Wait, Hodges." Greg turned around, almost toppling off the ladder. Luckily his girlfriend had prepared for this contingency and pushed him against the metal of the ladder steps. "Thanks, hon. Hodges, you have to stay."

"And explain to me, you disturbed little elf, why I would want to do that?"

"Because it's Christmas." Greg realized that the spirit of the season wasn't going to move the lab rat. "Sara's coming."

Hodges paused. "Maybe.I may pop in later."

After Hodges had left, Greg looked down at his girlfriend. "I'm good."

She rolled her eyes and pointed to the decorations. "Get working, Elf Boy."

--

TBC