"Are we good?"

"We'll be fine."

Catherine stared at him for a moment, and finally turned on her heel, ready to leave.

"Actually, we're not."

She froze in her footsteps, turning around. "Huh?"

"Come in and close the door, Catherine."

Catherine arched an eyebrow and came inside, shutting the door behind her. She took off her jacket, tossing it on the sofa as she walked over to him. "What?"

"We need to talk about this before it gets out of hand and ruins our working relationship."

Catherine sat in the chair in front of his desk. "Work first."

"What?"

"Work first. Never mind about our friendship that's been going down the drain for the last year."

"You really want to go down that path, Catherine?" Gil leant back in his chair. "We could be here all night."

Catherine frowned at him. "Looks like you were already sitting in for an all-nighter. Or are you just here because you feel you have to cover up my mistakes?"

"Maybe I wouldn't have to if you didn't keep lying to me."

"Isn't lying what we do best with each other? What we've been doing for almost 20 years?"

"I never lied to you, Catherine."

"What would you call it? What would you call your hearing, Lady Heather, Sara Sidle and god knows what else."

"That's different."

"Oh really? I can't wait to hear your explanation about this one!"

"First of all, you know all about Sara."

"You never told me that she asked you out."

Grissom looked up. "How did you.?"

"Oh come on, Grissom. We're the only two women and she seems to be jealous of me around you for some reason. Why wouldn't she want to laud all over me that she asked you out?"

Grissom opened his mouth and closed it again, feeling that it wasn't worth his life getting into that conversation. "As for Lady Heather.nothing inappropriate happened."

Catherine arched an eyebrow. "Is that what they call it now? Inappropriate?"

"You're being childish."

"That's rich coming from you. Something happens, let's just ignore it and maybe it'll go away."

"If you're referring to my hearing, then yes, I admit that I should have done something about it earlier. But we all make mistakes." He peered over his glasses at her.

"Yeah, I seem to have that talent down to an art form."

Grissom took his glasses off and folded his arms. "What are you talking about?"

Catherine rolled her eyes. "Good, dependable Gil Grissom. Close, but not close enough that he has to get involved in someone's life."

"I've always been here for you, Catherine."

"Let's go right back to the start, shall we? With dear old Ed fucking some woman behind my back?"

"Oh sure, throw that back up at me again."

"What, you think I forget small little details like that?"

"We've had this conversation before."

"No, we've started this conversation before. You always make sure we never finish it."

"Why is it always my fault?"

"Want me to share some of the blame? How generous of you. How about this.I married Eddie. Surely that's enough punishment for me." She stood up. "What was yours?"

Gil stood up. "Mine was coming to get you after Eddie had slapped you around. Mine was helping you into a bath when your body was covered in bruises. Mine was watching him turn you into something that I didn't want to know."

"Oh, we're onto the coke days now are we? Sure, let's go there. That was always fun."

"I'm surprised you can remember them."

"Contrary to what you may think.I remember everything." She glared at him. "Everything."

"If you are.once again.bringing up the fact I knew about Eddie's cheating.that is an old argument."

"One that never seems to be finished." She walked closer to him. "Just once, do you think you could tell me the truth?"

"I never told you because I knew how much you loved Eddie and I never thought you'd believe me anyway."

"The old Gil Grissom doesn't want to get too involved excuse." Catherine rolled her eyes. "You're so goddamn predictable."

"Sorry to disappoint you. But considering you have known me for around 20 years, I thought you'd be used to it by now."

Catherine glared at him. "Jesus, Grissom! What does it take to get a straight answer out of you? Big smart criminalist with the certificate on his wall thinks he has to talk in layman's terms for the ex-two bit whore?"

Grissom's hand slammed down on the table, causing Catherine to jump in surprise.

"Don't you EVER degrade yourself like that around me. I have NEVER treated you as anything less than my equal Catherine, so don't start that game with me."

Catherine was fired up now. "You think this is a game? You think that ANYTHING that has happened between us in the past 20 years has been a game?"

"It's what we do best."

"You have the answer to everything, don't you?"

"I know that I've been watching you in destructive relationships for 20 years."

Catherine glared at him. "Low blow." She walked over and grabbed her jacket. "I'm leaving."

"No, you're not," Grissom growled

"What are you going to do to stop me?" Catherine asked.

"You want me to hit you, Cath? Respond to that, don't we?"

Catherine stopped. She turned around to him, anger and tears in her eyes. "I can't believe that you of all people just said that to me."

Grissom had know he had gone too far the minute the words had left his mouth. He felt all the anger and fight leave him. "Cath."

She put a hand up. "Don't. Just don't. I'm going home."

"Cath."

"I said don't. You had no right to say that. No right at all." She smiled sadly now. "At least I know how you really feel now, right?" She put her jacket on and closed the door quietly behind her.

Grissom looked at the closed door for a moment before slumping down in his chair, head in his hands.

Catherine paced her living room back and forth. She was glad that Lindsey was staying at a friend's. She couldn't let her daughter see her angry or see her cry.

She still couldn't believe what Gil had said to her. Granted, they had been angry at each other, but she had never, ever expected him to say something like that to her.

She took her jacket off and threw it on the sofa. "I don't pick destructive relationships!" Catherine paused and frowned. "Not on purpose anyway."

A knock came at the door and Catherine let out an exasperated noise. She went out and when she flung open the door, she came face to face with Gil Grissom.

"What the hell do you want?" she growled.

"We need to finish our discussion," he said, coming in before she slammed the door in his face.

Catherine's eyes widened momentarily. He had never come into her home before she asked him. She shut the door and leant against it. "Make it quick."

Grissom almost laughed. "Trust me, this is going to be anything but quick."

Catherine folded her arms, following him into her living room. She sat on the sofa, moving her jacket out of the way. "Talk. And you better make it good," she growled.

"What we said."

"I'm sorry, what WE said?"

Grissom glared at her. "Are you trying to be difficult, or is it just another one of your charms?"

"It's another one of my charms," Catherine said, smiling sarcastically at him. "I thought after knowing me for 20 years, you'd be used to that."

Grissom didn't miss the mimic of his earlier words. "Thanks, Catherine. I always need a good reply of everything I say."

"Glad to be of some service to you." Catherine stood up. "I'll send you my bill."

Grissom stood up also, walking over to her. "I'm not paying."

She looked away from him. "You never did."

"Catherine, what I said to you earlier."

"Don't."

"What, you're not even going to let me apologise?"

"No one apologises for telling the truth."

"You took it the wrong way."

Fire flashed in her eyes. "EXCUSE me?"

Grissom paused. Perhaps he hadn't put that correctly. "Cath."

"So it's all MY fault? I misunderstood. I took it personally." Catherine's chest heaved in anger. "It could never be YOUR fault, could it, Gil? You're ALWAYS right!"

"Why didn't you pick me?" Grissom blurted out.

Catherine's eyes widened. "What?"

"You pick any guy you can have, as long as it's not me, right? That's how it works?"

"You never said anything."

"You never asked," he shot back. "Why the hell do you think I hate you being in relationships like that? God, Catherine, you deserve so much more than the bastards you date! I'm certainly no catch, but I'd never raise a hand to you."

Catherine mouth opened but she said nothing for a moment. Finally, she replied, "Paul never hit me."

"You keep forgetting Catherine, that I don't just see the physical bruises. I see the emotional ones."

"If you're so good at seeing everything, then you should have just done something about it."

Grissom's eyes flashed with anger and he took a step closer, positive he was invading her space. "You want me to Catherine? Really?"

Catherine glared at him. "I'm not afraid of you." A small part of her was terrified that she had pushed him too far, but the rest of her knew he would never physically hurt her.

They stared at each other for a moment, both wondering who would move first. With a strangled groan, Gil's lips crashed down on hers, his hands cupping her butt and wrenching her against him.

Catherine groaned at the intimate contact, and she kissed him back, pushing her body hard against his.

Grissom figured that if this was going to be the only time he could kiss Catherine, considering their friendship had shattered into a thousand pieces when their argument had started, he was going to make it worth their while. He deepened the kiss, his tongue exploring her mouth and tasting what was uniquely her.

Catherine moaned, rubbing against him as her arms encircled his neck, trying to get as close as possible to him.

When the kiss finally broke apart, they stared at each other, chests heaving, bodies humming with desire.

Her eyes were wide and her finger reached out to trace his lips. Gil's hand reached up to encircle her wrist and he pressed a gentle kiss to her finger.

"You should have said something," Catherine said, snatching her finger away.

Grissom glared at her. "Once again, all my fault, isn't it? Geez, Catherine, don't you take the blame for anything?"

As quick as lightening her hand shot through the air and connected with his cheek.

His eyes widened as his hand went to cover the place where she had slapped him.

"You deserved that," Catherine said, ignoring the tears that sprung to her eyes. "You son of a bitch, you deserved that."

"You hit me," Grissom said, in shock.

"You think I don't take the blame for anything? Let's forget about any lab mistakes to start with," Catherine said, ignoring his surprise. "I blame myself for Lindsey's unhappiness, for Eddie's death, for Eddie's cheating, for his abuse. I blame myself for not spending enough time with my daughter, for not giving her everything she wants in the world, for not bringing back her father. I blame myself for my mother, for her husband." She looked up at him, tears in her eyes. "So don't you DARE talk to me about blame."

Grissom's eyes widened. "Catherine.You can't blame yourself for those things. Eddie was not your fault. Your parents aren't your fault." He went to take her in his arms, but she stepped back, away from him. "Cath."

"Don't. You don't understand. Obviously you can't shoulder any blame because you're always right."

Grissom narrowed his eyes. "I have plenty of blame."

"Like what? You blame yourself for not getting your hearing checked sooner? You blame yourself for Sara fawning over you?" Catherine chuckled. "Sure, heavy burdens."

He walked over to her, gripping her shoulders.

"Let go," Catherine said, struggling.

"Not until you listen to me," he growled. "I blame myself every day for not getting you away from Eddie. I blame myself for not stopping him from hurting you. I blame myself for not turning him into the cops." His hand caressed her cheek. "I blame myself for not telling you I loved you sooner."

Catherine froze. She hadn't expected him to say that. She was silent for a moment, letting it sink in. "Loved me?"

Grissom realised he might finally have caught her attention. "In love with you," he corrected.

Catherine slowly let her eyes travel up to meet his. "In love with me?"

Grissom arched an eyebrow. "Are you just going to repeat everything I say?"

Catherine shook her head.

"Good." Grissom watched her for a moment. "Catherine, I can't fix everything I have or haven't done and said."

"I'm not asking you too," she replied quickly.

"I love you, Catherine," Grissom said again.

"This is going to change everything," she murmured. "Once we cross this line, we can't go back."

"I thought we'd already crossed it." Grissom sighed. "Besides, do you really want to go back to what has been between us lately?"

"There hasn't been anything between us lately. Isn't that the whole problem?"

"Exactly. So what's it gonna be, Catherine?"

"I love you," was the whisper that left her mouth.

Grissom let his hands rest on her hips. "Say it again."

"I love you," she said, a little louder.

Grissom groaned and let his hand travel underneath her shirt. "That wasn't so hard was it?"

Catherine shook her head slowly, the touch of his hand making her tingle all over.

His hands splayed across her tummy, gently stroking the soft skin. He grinned as he felt her muscles twitch from the stimulation.

"Is that good, Cath?"

She nodded rapidly, not willing to speak as his fingers explored her skin.

Grissom pulled his hands away and her eyes widened, looking up at him, wondering why he had stopped.

His hands went to the buttons of her shirt, deftly undoing them and pushing the shirt away from her shoulders.

Her eyes closed and her head fell back as his lips pressed kisses to her neck and shoulders. The more skin he uncovered, the more kisses he bestowed.

"Gil." she murmured, as he pulled the shirt away.

Grissom moved back and looked at her with a smile. "She speaks."

Catherine's eyes opened and she glared at him. "I thought we'd done enough speaking for awhile."

He nodded and kissed her lips gently. "They do say that actions speak louder than words."