Thunder claps, then rattles and rolls across the sky. The window panes vibrate angrily in their wooden frames. Perhaps from the storm outside... but perhaps from the storm brewing right here in my bedroom.

*See the storm is broken...*

Yes, you've heard right. At three o'clock in the morning, in Gil Grissom's bedroom... forces of nature, that had been kept at a safe distance for ages, have collided... and in doing so, have stirred up a storm.

*In the middle of the night...*

An unforgivable act has been committed. One that I promised myself I would never commit, but hell... when it comes to her? I'd throw out every one of my morals. It's not that the act, itself, was wrong... that's the only thing about our situation that's finally been made right. It's the circumstances under which the act was committed. She's married. It was a moment of weakness... perhaps just on my part, but maybe on both our parts.

*Nothing left here for me...*

And now she won't look at me. She just sits at the edge of my bed, the lightning occasionally illuminating her bare back, and just above her rear where the sheet doesn't cover her... while she stares stonily ahead. She's so different now. In a matter of moments, her whole personality has shifted. Only minutes ago, she was in my arms, whispering words of a lover. Right there... that's it... oh, God... more. And now, nothing. It's almost as if the moment her release washed over her, it washed away any emotion she'd ever felt for me all these years.

*It's washed away...*

She's cold. And not just physically, when I reach out to touch her back. She's cold when she flinches. She's cold when she moves away. She's cold when she gives me that look. So I look out the window, to watch the rain.

*The rain pushes buildings aside...*

It's almost weird to think of this now, but... the storm began when our bodies joined. When I first slid inside her, lightning struck the ground... and by the force with which it rattled the townhouse, it didn't strike that far away from us. I should've taken it as a sign. But it was too late. I was lost.

*The sky turns black, the sky...*

I turn to look at her again, hoping she's not still giving me that death glare... and I find her looking down at her lap... the sheet tucked primly under her arms, covering her body from my view, and she putzes with her hands. I know what she's doing. She's analyzing what we've just done. Cataloguing everything I'd said, and everything she'd said, along with what we'd done. Next she'll lock it up tight in that razor sharp mind of hers... seal it up in that dark filing cabinet she's got hidden somewhere in there, along with everything else about her life she pushes away.

*Wash it far, push it out to sea...*

She won't deal with this now. I know it. I know the tense determination in her jaw. There will be no discussing our feelings. There will be no mentioning the possibility of an 'us'... there can't be one. Not now. Not logically. There will be nothing.

*There's nothing left here for me...*

When she turns her eyes up to mine, I look away again, out the window... why, I don't know. Maybe I don't want to see the coldness in her eyes. Maybe I don't want to watch in trepidation for the moment when she'll gather her clothes, dress quickly in the bathroom, and make a quick exit. Maybe I don't want to see much of anything right now. So I watch the storm, while the one between us builds.

*I watch it lift up to the sky...*

How did we get here? How did everything we'd built in the way of friendship over the years get destroyed by something so seemingly insignificant? Then my brain kicks in... because it wasn't insignificant, you foolish bastard. It held all the significance in the world. A silent declaration of love. A promise of new beginnings. And yet somehow, between the moment the act reached completion, and the moment we're at now... everything between us was crushed. How did it happen?

*I watch it crush me...*

Nothing was said between those two moments that could've brought about the end to our friendship. The end to our professional relationship. Everything had been so perfect. When I had her in my arms, I thought I'd died and gone to heaven. And now? I think I may have just plain died.

*And then I die...*

I ache to know what she's thinking. I'm dying to know what she's feeling in this moment. Remorse, because she's married to another man? Guilt, because right now she's carrying this man's baby? Or fear, for what will happen to her if he ever finds out? I want her to talk to me... I need to know...

*Speak to me baby, in the middle of the night...*

I'd been so sure of where we stood before we started this. I'd been so sure that after we took this leap together, things would change for the better. She'd leave him. She'd be mine. We'd raise her baby together, become a family. How damned stupid am I? I now want to scream at her... talk to me, Catherine! Tell me what you're thinking. Brush those beautiful lips to mine and promise me that we'll be okay. Please.

*Pull your mouth close to mine...*

Because right now I'm only seeing the end. The demise of everything I've held dear over these past ten years. I can see everything falling apart... foundation cracking that had taken ten years to lay down. I see us slipping away from each other... becoming strangers. I can see a shadow falling over her heart that's blacker than death. Don't let this be the end, Catherine.

*I can see the wind coming down, like black night...*

As if she hears my thoughts, my beauty turns to look at me, and I hold my breath. Will it be the death glare? Will I see love shining in her eyes? My heart falls when her eyes meet mine. No... no, it's not love. It's not the sparkle of adoration and devotion her eyes held moments earlier. It's a twinkle of sadness... with a twinge of fear, and a hint of guilt. The wind rattles the windows, and I turn to look briefly before turning back to Catherine, knowing my eyes are pleading with her. Talk to me...

*So speak to me...*

She hears my thoughts again, and bows her head, shaking it side to side sadly. She doesn't want to speak to me. It will do no good to talk. Words can't undo what's just occurred between us... words can't halt the pain that will inevitably consume us both.

*Like the winds outside...*

It's over. Everything we've worked so hard to maintain for ten years is over, with just one instance of guards being let down... of one letting the other in. And as we lock in a stare, I know she shares my thoughts. And when she reaches over to grasp my hand, I choke back a sob at the touch. She's cold.

*It's broken up, pushing us...*

I have to look away so she won't see the tears, but I know she knows they're there. Just as I know there are tears she's holding back, too. There's no sense crying. What's done is done. Now all we can do is watch the rain.

*Hear the rain fall, see the wind come to my eyes...*

We watch in silence as the rain pounding the windows in sheets gets lighter, and lighter... until just a mist remains. Then the clouds break. They fade away... leaving a black emptiness in their wake.

*See the storm broken, now nothing...*

I glance back to Catherine and she glances at me, releasing my hand to rise to her feet. The sheet goes with her, a pure white coccoon enveloping her beauty, and I have to fight not to beg... instead letting my eyes do it for me. Please say something...

*Speak to me baby, in the middle of the night...*

She draws in a breath and lets it out in a sigh... and this is the closest I've gotten to hearing actual words in what seems like hours. I don't know what I want her to tell me. I don't know if I'd rather hear that what we did was wrong, and we can never do it again... or that what we did was amazing, and she'd dump that jerk as soon as she got home. And I'm still not sure what she's going to say even when she leans down, cups the back of my neck in her hand, and brushes her lips to mine.

*Speak to me, hold your mouth to mine...*

Our lips caress, and she chokes back a sob. She doesn't even need to speak, now. I know what she's going to say. I can tell just by the way her lips are capturing mine. It's a kiss goodbye. And when she pulls away, she gives the final blow. "Goodbye, Gil..."

*'Cause the sky is breaking...*

And everything breaks. This thing between us... that's been there for ten years... that had the ability to either bring us together or pull us apart, has pulled us completely, and irrevocably apart. Its power went deeper than either of us could've ever imagined.

*It's deeper than love...*

It was more powerful than love; stronger than hate. It was the ultimatum that neither of us had been expecting. And now it's over. Not for lack of love... I know how she feels. I saw it in her eyes for nearly ten years, and I know it's still in those eyes somewhere. She loves me.

*I know the way you feel...*

It's a lack of courage, on both our parts. She's not courageous enough to stand up to him, to leave him and have the life she's always wanted. And I'm not courageous enough to fight for her. To stand up to the man that treats her so horribly and prove that I'm the one that's better for her. We'll both do nothing... knowing that in each other's arms is where we really want to be... and instead let this thing die right here and now.

*Like the rains outside...*

When she throws on her clothes and heads for the door, I don't bother giving a goodbye... and she doesn't bother asking for one. We both knew it was goodbye the moment we committed this act. This was our undoing. And now my sky is broken.

*So speak to me...*

...What have I done?

~FINIS~