The peace of Gil's office was disturbed by the appearance of Catherine, who, without knocking, entered, a huge grin on her face as she sat opposite him. "Gil."

"Catherine."

"How does it feel to be pushing sixty?" Catherine asked a twinkle in her eyes, the smile evident.

Gil raised one eyebrow, taking off his glasses before answering. "I've only been fifty for one day Cath, you have to give these things time. You could chart my progress if you wanted?"

"I could use a computer simulation... but watching the real thing is much more fun." Catherine let her eyes run up and down Gil's body, laughing as the redness overcame his features.

He shifted uncomfortably and cleared his throat. "So you're going to follow me around for the next ten years making notes?"

"Would that bother you?"

"Cath..." he spluttered thankful that she'd swung the door closed as she entered.

Her smile was pure innocence. "What?"

"You know what." His blush deepened.

She raised an eyebrow. "Now Gil what are you getting yourself all worked up about?" She purred.

"Did you actually want something? Or did you just come in here to give me a hard time?"

Catherine burst into giggles, but smacked her hand across her mouth to smother them. "Can't I have come in here to do both?"

"You're incorrigible."

She grinned, "One of the things you love about me."

His eyes narrowed in thought briefly, and then he nodded with a small sound of agreement.

Catherine cleared her throat, glancing down slightly. "About last night..."

"Can we not talk about that?"

"Why? Why wouldn't you want to talk about it? A chance to change your life completely? Milestones make you think of things like that." Her eyes were serious, no sign of the earlier teasing.

"I know, but..."

"But what?" She threw her hands up in exasperation. "Are we going to have to wait nine years and three hundred and sixty-four days to have this conversation again?"

"Would you wait?" he asked her, his tone deadly serious, and the fear in his eyes breaking her heart.

"Not for this, no."

"I can't do this right now, Cath."

"Why not?" her voice was soft, but the expression on her face told him his answer was about to make or break everything they'd ever had. "If not now, then when?"

He rubbed a hand across his eyes, and then looked back at her. "Why are you pushing this?"

He couldn't be sure if the sound she made was a laugh or a sob, and she shook her head as she said, "Because I've let you push us aside for years and I'm tired of waiting."

"I can't, Cath, not now." His eyes dropped to his desk, he started to idly play with his glasses.

She reached across taking hold of his hand, to still his actions, and in doing so force him to face her once again. "Maybe I need this too. Have you thought about that? It's not all about you, Gil... I need to know where this is going"

"What's wrong with...?"

"Don't ask me what's wrong with how our relationship is going. I feel like I'm wandering around without a map."

He sighed, his fingers instinctively going to his temple and massaging the tension that was building. He didn't know what to say. Last night it had seemed so simple, such an easy choice to make. But when the euphoria of the night wore off his demons returned to haunt him. He couldn't do this. He knew that now, couldn't expose her to his fears. His instinct told him to run, escape before it was too late, yet his heart sang a different tune. "I don't know what you want me to say, Cath?"

She reached across, gently placing her palm over his heart. "Tell me what this is feeling. What your heart is telling you."

"It's not that simple."

"It is, if you want it to be. What do you really want?"

He swallowed, then covered her hand with his, whispering. "You. I want you."

Catherine beamed, her smile easily portraying her happiness. "See how simple that was?"

"But..."

"No buts. You want me; you got me, no turning back, no change of heart. We can do this. Do you trust me? Believe me?"

"I..."

"Don't doubt yourself Gil. Don't doubt us. If you start to do that we'll shatter before we start."

He saw the sincerity in her eyes, the belief. Maybe she was right, maybe it was possible. A smile beginning to curl the corners of his lips, he nodded slowly. "I trust you."

"So. What is it?" Her eyebrow rose as the question was asked.

"What?"

"This thing, this something, the barrier you are putting between yourself and our happiness."

"What if I'm not good enough for you? What if I screw this up? What if I ruin our friendship?"

Catherine sighed, leaning back in the chair. "You can't live your life frightened by the what ifs. Sometimes you need to take a risk… Am I worth that risk?" She held her breath, fearful of the reply, but at the same time desperate to know his answer.

His eyes shot immediately to hers, "Of course you are!... To be with you would definitely be worth the risk..."

"But?"

"But what if I hurt you? I couldn't live with myself if I turned out to be another Eddie in your life."

She stood up, exasperated, "You're not Eddie, Gil!"

"How do you know?"

"I just do."

"But...marriage can change people, you know that better than most."

"Who said anything about marriage? I'm just trying to get you to agree to dinner." She moved around his desk, settling on the edge of it. Being so close to him was sweet torture, all she wanted to do was hold him, but she knew now was not the time. "Besides marriage can't change the fundamental relationship. Eddie and I weren't that great to start with, the marriage just exacerbated our problems."

"I've never been in a committed long term relationship. I don't know how I'd behave."

"How long have you loved me?"

"How long have we known each other?"

"So why should you start to behave any differently just because it's out in the open?"

Gil pondered her words, smiling slightly as he realized she was correct. "Dinner?" He half muttered.

"Yes, you know the meal usually eaten at night, we get to dress up, forget what we do every day and rejoin society for a few hours."

He smiled, winking at her. "I hear society is vastly overrated."

"So that's a yes?"

His fingers linked with hers, the touch she'd craved earlier fulfilled, she bit back a sigh that threatened to reveal her emotions. "Just tell me when and where. I'll be waiting for you."

Catherine let Gil pull her into his lap, a smile gracing her face as she felt his hands glide over her back. "I'm not going to let you off that easy. You make the plans."

"You ask me out, but I have to make the plans?" he said, holding her closer to him.

"I took the first step, the hard ones. All you have to do is pick a restaurant."

"I guess I can manage that," he smiled.

"Good. Then I think I can manage to find a nice little dress to wear."

His eyebrow raised, his mind anticipating just what a `little dress' meant in Catherine-speak. A smirk took residence on his face.

"Now that," he said, stealing a chaste kiss that promised more, "is definitely worth it."

THE END