"What exactly are we doing here, Gil?"

"You know what we're doing. You're helping me find the perfect anniversary present for Cath."

"Yeah, I get that part Gil. I'm simply wondering what we are doing in a store that sells washing machines."

"Well, I thought that Cath would appreciate a new washer drier. Plus, it's sort if funny, buying my wife domestic goddess type gifts."

"Have you met Catherine? You really think this is something Cath would laugh at? She would kick your ass, and worse than that she would kick mine for letting you buy it. I'm under strict instructions here."

"Okay. So you know what she wants?"

"No. I've been instructed to make sure you buy something good, that's it. Now none of these babies in here qualify as that, so let's roll."

"I don't know what to buy. I want it to be perfect, and if I screw up?"

"Enough. You will not screw up, I will not allow you disappoint my girl."

"I thought we agreed she was my girl."

"Yeah. Okay, fair point. Let's find our girl a present worthy of her."

"Fine. Do you think I should buy her jewellery? Or is that too tacky. Lindsey thinks that I should make her some."

"Gil, we both know women are not my field of expertise, but I'm inclined to believe that plastic beads and trinkets are not the most romantic way to celebrate your love. You're usually great with gifts, Gil. Catherine still talks about the birthday present you got her."

"What if that was my one good idea? This is important, Jon. I want her to remember our anniversary. I only get one chance to get our first anniversary right. I want her to feel special."

"Listen, Catherine still talks about the weekend you guys went on for her birthday. She talks about it in such glowing terms that I've got Daniel nagging me to take him there. Infact I've got Daniel nagging me to be more thoughful and perfect like you, and then I do the same to him. So I suppose you do have a reputation to live up to. Okay let's think about this. Clothes?"

"I'll get it wrong, buy the wrong size or wrong colour. She'll think I'm calling her fat, or unsexy or that I don't pay attention to what she likes."

"Tried clothes before then Gil?"

"I surprised her with a sweater one day. Never again. Never. What else?"

"Shoes."

"You should no better than that Jon. Never interfere with a woman and her shoes. She would pity me for whatever choice I made."

"Did you surprise her with shoes?"

"Yeah. Lindsey still refers to it as the 'shoe incident'."

"Oh I've heard that story, you are not allowed near a shoe shop my friend. Okay, what about perfume?"

"I could do that, but that's just not trying. Anyway she doesn't need perfume, I like Cath the way she is."

"God, why were you never snapped up before? Seriously, you say all the right things, and you look good in black, and you can cook. What were women thinking? Wait, you can cook. Why don't you cook a wonderful meal for her, impress her with your thoughfulness."

"Hmm. That would be good, but I do that once a week anyway. So it's not going to be out of the ordinary."

"You really are too perfect. Okay, what about a book. A book that means something to you, and that you want to share with Cath."

"..."

"You do that already, don't you?"

"Well it was Cath's idea to begin with, but , yeah, we do that already."

"If I didn't love you guys so much, you would be making me a little sick with all the perfection. What else is there you could you get her? Seriously, what are we gonna buy?"

"I did have a thought."

"I've noticed that about you. What did you think.?"

"Well the first anniversary is called 'paper'."

"And you know this how?"

"Linds tells me stuff."

"Okay. Carry on."

"Well, I thought that I would buy a journal, and I would write to Catherine. Write to her about how I feel. About how much I love her."

"God, Cath's so lucky. That's very sweet. And this is not something you've done before..."

"Well I've been busy with the cooking, and the present buying, and the reading and being generally perfect."

"Funny man. So we buy a journal and then we write in it about our girl and how much we love her."

"No, I write about my girl and how much I love her. Of how happy she makes me. I write about my girl and of my wishes for our future."

"Okay. That would be a good present, I think she'll aprove."