"You can't have what he's not willing to give you," said a voice, behind her.

Sara heard it but did not turn. She was standing in the hallway and watching the scene in the quiet layout room. She seemed frozen to her spot. She heard the person behind her sigh.

The scene they were both watching was quite common, they both knew. It happened quite frequently since it was actually a part of their job description. Maybe it wasn't the scene itself. Maybe it was the emotions that they could both feel emanating from the people in the room even though they were both standing slightly outside the layout room.

Or maybe it was just because Sara wanted to be the only one he had eyes for every single moment of the day. Maybe the scene did not mean as much as she read into it. There was really no obvious reason that she should feel bile rising in her throat. That she should feel a consuming hollowness as she watched.

It was nothing out of the ordinary really, just Grissom and Catherine standing close to each other. Comparing notes as they discussed the photographs spread out on the table. They were standing very much in each other's personal space. It was not unusual.

Their discussion was focused and intense. Their voices were not raised or anything. In fact, they were speaking in almost- whispers as they scrutinized the evidence. Their stances shifted as they moved while trying to solve the puzzle.

Grissom leant over Catherine's shoulder. He reached behind her to shift a photograph. She arranged a few and stepped back, nearly into his arms. But he didn't move and she stopped just shy of that stance. Then it was her turn to look over his shoulder as he pointed out different things. They continued to shift positions. Always moving within a hair's breadth of each other.

As Sara watched, she felt a sharp bitterness. For the things that she never will be. For what she can never have. She does not know if what she is watching is what she wants. As far as she knows, they are not together. They are just the best of friends. This scene does not tell her any differently.

But she can't even have that. What she is to him, she doesn't know. But she does know that she means less to him than the strawberry-blonde he stands close to. The looks that they share, she does not share that much with him.

The man behind her can read the look on her face. It's not the first time. He feels a little of what she feels sometimes, possibly. For maybe he would like to share more with Catherine than he does now. But it hasn't happened yet.

"You can't be her, Sara. Just be yourself," advises Warrick. He leaves her to get back to work.

Sara still does not enter the room. She has a report to show them. The three of them are working the case together. She knows that Warrick is right. But she can't change how she feels. She envies Catherine and she wants Grissom. Beyond that, there is only her job and nothing much else.

The End