Gil fingered the ring in his pocket, barely able to believe what he was about to do.

He'd met Catherine less than a year before hand, a stripper, he should have had the sense to walk quickly in the other direction, but he didn't, he stayed, talked to her, and found her to be unlike any stripper he'd ever met

Oh sure she was a wildcat alright, but she was intelligent, had a quick wit and biting humour that could cut him to shreds in a heart beat, but generally left him in stitches from laughter, and a kind heart, the sort of woman who might alternately hug you, or hit you, depending on the situation at hand.

Fiercely loving and loyal to those close to her.

Catherine was all so stunningly beautiful. Blonde locks that looked either strawberry or honey, depending on the light. Dazzling blue eyes that lit up like sunshine on the ocean when she smiled.

Gil Grissom was in love. Absolute. All encompassing. Love.

The kind of love most people wouldn't expected the mild, quiet, scientist capable of, such was the force of passion behind his heart, most of his work colleges would have balked at the idea, not because they thought him incapable of feeling, but because they didn't imagine anyone so calm could have felt the wild torrent of emotions that swept through him in Catherine's presence.

There she was, waiting for him as normal, coffee in one hand, some magazine or another in her other, her blonde locks tied back into a wild mass of curly ponytail, wearing a top that covered so little she may well not have been wearing it at all, but her lithe figure worked in her favour, and she looked stunning as always.

"Morning Catherine." Gil greeted her, carefully sitting down across from her while the waitress came to pour him his coffee.

"Your late." Catherine said when she finally looked up.

"Had something to take care off, hope you weren't waiting too long." Gil said, smiling gently at the teasing in her tone.

"Only an hour or so." She said.

"You fib missy Catherine... you been here only ten minutes." The waitress, who knew them well said laughing.

"Darn Rosie, gone and spoiled all my fun." Catherine complained with a grin.

"Thank-you Rosie for being more honest than this little minx... could I have one of your delicious wheaten bagels please?" Gil asked.

"Of course mister Gil... and for your, still warm from the oven." She said, bustling away to retrieve his breakfast.

"So what did keep you late?" Catherine asked.

"Had to drop home to pick something up, you?"

"Work... bust up, cops, questions, all the normal fun things in my life." Catherine said shaking her head.

Gil reached a hand across the table and held hers.

He hated what she did, not because of any hate for strippers, each to their own, but because he saw how Catherine was capable of so much more, how she wanted so much more, but was afraid to strive for it.

"Cath..."

"It's fine Gil, this is my life, it's fine." Catherine said.

Gil moved around to the other side of the booth beside her, pulling her close. He saw Rosie leave his breakfast on the table, but she slipped away quickly, leaving them in the privacy that the early morning allowed, because most people weren't yet up and about and the bakery/café was empty.

"Your capable of so much more Cath, you deserve so much more." Gil whispered

"Well life isn't about what we deserve." Catherine said, the few moments of weakness being over come by her natural stubbornness as she pulled back from his offered comfort.

"No it's not, Cath... Catherine... I wasn't going to do this here, like this but..." Gil reached into his pocket to retrieve the elegant gold band with the simple, single diamond perched stylishly at it's top centre.

Catherine's gasp was enough to tell him, she understood what he was doing.

It was sudden he knew, they'd known each other less than a year, and had in fact only become lovers just a few weeks before hand, but it felt so right.

"Catherine, will you marry me?" he asked, gently taking her hand back into his grasp.

Catherine's eyes welled with tears.

"No."

Gil wasn't sure he'd heard right, he'd been so sure she felt the same, but when she forced herself past him and ran clear out of the café, he knew he had heard right.

Gil had sat unmoving for a good twenty minutes, until the jingle of the bell over the door brought him back to the real world. Rosie was behind the counter, a sadness in her gaze when she looked over at him, Gil wanted to be sick, literally in the pit of his stomach, but instead he forced himself to down his bagel and cold coffee, and leaving Rosie a generous tip in the form of a diamond ring he never wanted to see again, he left.

He went through the motions at work, did the job he knew he was good at, but it was hard to miss the change.

Where Gil had always been calm, and collected, now he was icy cold, but no-one was brave enough to ask the reason, most were afraid they didn't want to know, and that he wouldn't tell them anyway.

A year passed, then two, it was almost a full three before he saw her again. At the university, her head bent over a dozen books when he'd entered the library.

When he finally worked up the courage to say hello, he saw blank-determination greet him, as she told him of her new husband, and her daughter.

Gil tried to swallow past the lump in his throat when he was shown the picture of the bouncing bubbly two year old, with her mothers hair, and her mothers eyes, and a grin that lit up the room much like her mothers did.

"We called her Lindsay." Catherine had told him, bubbling over with joy when she talked about the little girl.

Gil never asked when Catherine had met Eddie. He never asked why she'd said no, or where she went after that. He loved her always, and was there when Eddie finally came crashing down on her head, holding her and wiping away the tears.

He had the ring still, which Rosie had seen fit to return to him. He kept it hidden away in the back of his bedside cabinet, never looked at, but never forgotten, a reminder somewhere in the back of his mind of that night, of the meaning and consequence one small word could have.

How one two letter word could destroy his dreams, and break his heart. One small word.

No.

Fini