Catherine smiled as she watched her daughter. She was growing up so fast.

It was the middle of summer, and Lindsay had insisted on a barbecue.

She had made invitations to Catherine's fellow CSI's by hand, and helped write a menu with a vegetarian alternate for Sara. She was a very clever little girl.

"Ahhh no Uncle Gil put me down!" Catherine laughed as Gil did indeed put Lindsay down, right in the middle of the paddling pool, splashing Sara, Greg and Nick who all had their feet dipped into it as they lounged on deck chairs.

Gil adored Lindsay, and the feeling was more than returned. To Lindsay, Gil had become like a father since Eddies death. If only either of them knew, there was the very real possibility Gil could be her father.

Catherine remembered everything about the night she'd met Eddie. It was two nights after she'd said no to Gil.

She'd been feeling ill all day, but she put it down to the pain of losing her best friend, of losing Gil. Eddie was a charmer... well maybe a little more on the smarm than the charm, but he was cute, and he was willingly buying her enough booze to flood the strip, so she let him.

When she woke up the next morning with a bruise on her arm, and tenderness below, she knew she'd slept with him, even before she'd realised that she was at his place, with his arm around her and his alcohol filled morning breath on her neck.

She'd wanted to run, find Gil, say sorry, beg forgiveness, say Yes to marrying him, but she didn't, she stayed. Stayed beside the drunken lout who would later become her husband, because Eddie was on her level, Eddie was down in the slums, Eddie was what she deserved.

At least, that was how she'd seen it all those years ago.

Catherine had left home at 16, come back at 17, and been a stripper in Vegas by 18.

She drank, partied, drank and partied. She'd wanted to go to school, and had eventually signed up for a course at UNLV, but had dropped out.

It was only when she'd had Lindsay, at the age of 26 things had really changed.

No that wasn't true, things had changed before that really. Gil had changed her. But at the time Catherine had been scared, and stupid, and she believed that stripping, that everything back then was what she deserved.

When Gil had asked her to marry him, every bone in her body had screamed yes her heart had practically bust out of her chest screaming 'yes, yes, yes' over and over, but she'd opened her mouth and said no.

Not because she'd wanted to say no, but because she didn't think she had any right to say yes.

Gil was everything Catherine was not. Brilliant, dedicated, sober for most of the day. He was good, and kind, and had a wonderfully strange sense of fun, that he'd shown to her in a way she knew she'd always treasure.

He deserved better than her.

When they'd met again, nearly three years had passed.

Catherine showed Gil pictures of Lindsay, telling him the child was Eddie's, and he'd never questioned it, though surely he must have known the dates called it into some question at least.

She had signed up for a course in Medical Technology, and was doing well all things considered. Not the least of which had to be her daughter and idiot husband.

She studied, she stripped, and she raised her daughter, it was hard and there were times Catherine almost gave up but meeting Gil again had given her the strength.

He'd never spoken of their past, but had immediately come to her aid. Helping with studying. Giving her a place to stay when Eddie got to much. Even helping out with money a little though she'd later insisted on paying him back every cent.

They were best friends once more. But it was never the same.

Gil was never just as open, never just as alive, and full of fun as he had been when they had first met. No more did he tickle her into submission for the last jelly donut when they spent time together. Except for the nights she ran from Eddie, he never invited her into his home. He was her best friend, but he wasn't the Gil Grissom she'd first met and fell in love with, and somewhere in the back of her mind that was her constant nagging thought.

She'd made him like he was. She'd hurt him so badly that he retreated in on himself more often than not, and the thought pained her.

A scream of delight from her daughter forced Catherine out of her meanderings and made her look across to the paddling pool where Gil was now sitting, still fully dressed and soaked head to toe a giggling Lindsay in his lap being tickled to tears.

It was only at times like this, with Lindsay, with his team, that Catherine saw flashes of the old Gil, and she treasured them all.

"Mom! Help!" Lindsay squealed, trying desperately to get lose of Gil's grasp

Gil looked towards her and grinned, an evil glint in his eyes, and quicker than Catherine could comprehend he had let Lindsay go and was stalking towards her still dripping wet.

"Oh no, don't you dare Gil Grissom don't you...ahhh"

Gil grabbed at her and tossed her towards the paddle pool, yet again splashing the three younger CSI's, leaving Warrick as the only dry person there.

"I'm gonna get you for that Mr Grissom." Catherine vowed.

Gil grinned and began to tickle her.

Maybe there was hope for them yet.

Fini