"What brought about this personal revelation?" Catherine Willows asked sitting crossed legged and waiting for her friend Gil Grissom to answer.

Looking over at her and taking in how beautiful she really was, he couldn't help but get caught up in her gaze and thinking back to just one week earlier.

Grissom was rushing about as usual, cursing himself for leaving everything to the last minute just as he did every year. He had promised himself last year that he would get all his Christmas shopping done early and yet here he was again on the 22nd December running around like an idiot again.

Oh the important present had all been bought in plenty of time, with much thought and care put into their purchase. His mom's was already with her in Marina Del Ray and Catherine and Lindsey's were hidden in a closet in his house already wrapped and covered with much tape so that if either of them managed to find them early they wouldn't be able to sneak a peak and spoil the surprise.

Now all he had to do was get something for his friends and the three younger members of his team were causing him a real problem. He knew he should have enlisted Catherine's help, she always seemed to know just the right gift to buy, but she was off on vacation as was her usual habit for this time of year.

As soon as it drew close to the school Christmas vacation, Catherine used up ten days of her precious vacation time to spend it with Lindsey. This year would be hard on the little girl, her first Christmas without her father, but Gil would do everything he could to help Catherine make it an extra special one.

Standing in line waiting to pay for his items he heard a familiar laugh coming from somewhere behind him. Straining round he caught sight of the strawberry blonde and the smile faded on his face.

There was Catherine Willows looking as gorgeous as always but her arms were wrapped around a handsome looking young man and they were clearly having fun. Their body language spoke volumes of their familiarity with each other and Grissom's Holiday spirit died.

'Damn!' he thought savagely to himself, 'I only have myself to blame,' it didn't make it any easier but he knew it was true. He had always had feelings for the vibrant woman but had held back on acting on them because of his relationship with Lindsey and the interference of one Eddie Willows. The man had always made any possible romantic relationship between Gil and Catherine seem sordid and dirty and Gil had worried that she might view it that way too.

When the man had been murdered, Grissom had been sad and sorry but not for Eddie Willows. He had never liked the man and didn't see the point of being a hypocrite and mourning him when he died. No, Gil had been sorry for the grieving family he had left behind.

He knew that Catherine had no longer been in love with the jerk, but also knew she would always carry a special place for him in the corner of her heart because he had given her Lindsey. The young girl had been distraught at her father's death and angry that her mom and her friends hadn't caught his killer. She hadn't spoken to Gil, Catherine or Sara for two weeks and they had all been getting very worried when she had suddenly relented.

Lindsey hadn't forgiven them, she had simply dismissed the subject and never brought it up with Gil or Sara again, if she still bemoaned the fate at her mom, Catherine had never said and he hadn't wanted to push things. She'd tell him if she wanted to and she knew that she could. He would always be there for both of them.

Eddie's death had also left him with the possibility of revealing his feelings for his friend, but when his hearing had taken a turn for the worse he had put things off again. Catherine had enough problems; she didn't need his as well. Even though in the end she had seen him through the surgery and the recuperation; their relationship growing even stronger. Still he had waited.

Now apparently it was too late. Paying for his purchases Grissom left the store as quickly as he could and prayed that she hadn't even seen him.

Two days later he had received a call from Lindsey, checking to make sure he was still coming to Christmas dinner with them. His first reaction had been to beg off, if Catherine did have a new boyfriend he would likely be there too and Gil couldn't handle being in such close proximity to that.

Then he had felt selfish, he had promised Lindsey earlier that month he would be there and he wouldn't let the little girl down. It would be a hard enough day for the child without the additional disappointment. So trying to sound cheerful he had assured her he would be there on time.

Arriving at the Willows' house he took a deep breath to prepare himself for what might confront within and rang the doorbell. A smiling Catherine answered the door, glass of wine in hand.

She took his jacket from him and gave him the drink. "Merry Christmas, Gil," she said, kissing him on the lips.

Trying to control his reaction, he smiled and replied, "Merry Christmas, Catherine," praying his voice sounded normal. She had kissed him countless times before but it had always been on the cheek, just a little peck. This was the first time she had actually kissed him on the lips and despite himself he couldn't help but hope it might be a sign of better things to come. Then he remembered the young man from the department store and fought not to sigh.

Entering the main room of the house he was delighted to see that Lindsey was its only occupant. "Uncle Gil!" the child screamed in delight and launched herself into his arms at a run. Bracing himself he caught her and embraced her.

They had fun going through all the gifts Lindsey had received and his learning who had given her what. She was a very popular child and all the members of their team loved her. He was a little surprised to find that even Jim Brass had caved to the child's affections and there was a present from the pugnacious captain as well.

Sitting down to a dinner Catherine had obviously spent all day cooking, Grissom found himself relaxing and wishing this was something they could share every day of the week. He listened to Lindsey prattle on about all that had happened to her in the last week, politely making comments where they were required, but a new name brought his complete attention to the child.

"Tom?" he asked curiously.

"Oh yeah," Lindsey continued blithely on, ignorant of the tension permeating the grown man beside her, "he came down for a couple of days last week and he and mom went shopping for last minute Christmas stuff, not that they'd tell me what they bought," and the child pouted at her mother.

'God,' thought Catherine, 'I wish to hell she hadn't picked that up so accurately from Gil, neither of them has any idea of what it does to my insides,' she concealed a secret smile, 'thank God.'

Grissom turned to Catherine and she could see he was still curious about who Tom was, could that be jealously she saw in his eyes? No, don't be stupid, he couldn't feel the same way for her she did for him. She was far to unsure of herself when it came to her feelings for Gil Grissom to make any sort of move without at least a hint that he might harbour some feelings for her and so far she had seen no indication of it.

"Tom is my cousin from Montana," she explained, trying to hide her startled expression when she clearly saw relief momentarily flood her friend's face, "we hadn't seen one another since before I left home the last time," she continued, "but he called me about a month ago after his wife died and asked if he could come and spend sometime with Lindsey and I, get away from familiar and painful memories for a little while and I just couldn't refuse him."

Gil nodded; he knew that Catherine would know exactly how the man had been feeling and that her cousin would also have been grateful for her understanding.

The rest of the day went by in a blur as Grissom contemplated the fact that he might actually still have a chance. The man had been her cousin, not her new boyfriend. Now all he had to do was pluck up the nerve and, find the right time, to see if there was the possibility of something more than friendship for him and Catherine.

Allowing the members of his team some personal time during the festive season meant that Gil was either on duty or on call until the 28th the night that Catherine returned to work and his last before he had three nights off.

They had paired up together on a robbery/homicide, while Warrick and Sara had worked a missing persons. Both cases had gone without a hitch and they had been able to conclude them before clocking off for the night.

As they all headed to the parking lot Gil snaked his hand out and caught a hold of Catherine's, "Hey, Lindsey's at Eddie's folks for the night, isn't she?"

Catherine flexed her neck and shoulders to rid herself of some of the tension she was feeling before saying, "yeah, one of the reasons I came back last night, the house seems so empty without her."

He nodded, "Fancy some breakfast then?" he saw her hesitate, "my place, I'll cook?"

That seemed to tilt the decision in his favour, "Okay, as long as you cook," she smiled at him and his heart began to beat faster. "I couldn't face a fast food joint right now and I don't have the energy to cook myself."

Smiling, Gil risked placing his hand in the small of her back and escorting her to his car. The heat from her body seemed to raise his temperature by about fifty degrees and he wondered how he was going to get through this. He wanted to be open and honest with her and thought that relaxing after a nice breakfast might give him that opportunity.

With difficulty Catherine walked toward the car feeling his hand on her back and her skin tingling at the touch. God she wished she knew how he felt. Just the touch of his hand did more for her than all of Eddie's so called expertise love making.

Once safely ensconced in Grissom's townhouse, breakfast all but a distant memory, Gil sat studying his guest.

"Penny for them?" she asked him, smiling that sunshine bright smile of hers.

Plucking up his courage he answered, "I was just thinking how beautiful you look," he saw a start of surprise and rushed on before his courage left him.

"Catherine, I have to tell you something," he hesitated only long enough to lick suddenly dry lips and then continued, "I've been trying to hide my feelings for you for years and I just can't do it any longer."

"Gil..."

"No, let me finish," he interrupted, placing his index finger over her mouth, "I've been in love with you for years and now I'm wondering if it's too late for us to try?"

Before he could move his hand, before she even thought of what to say, she instinctively kissed his finger and then took it into her mouth, suckling on it.

The effect was almost instantaneous and Grissom was appalled when a certain part of his anatomy reacted in a predictable fashion to what she was doing. His face flushed with embarrassment.

In one smooth motion Catherine was at his side, kissing his mouth and running her hand down his chest, her quest leading her ever southwards.

"You have no idea how long I have wanted you to say something like that," she informed him and smiled when he gasped, his breath catching in his throat as she reached her destination.

"I take it you want to try then?" he managed to say in a breathy whisper.

She chuckled and taking his hand pulled him to his feet and led him to the bedroom.

"Gil?" her voice broke into his thoughts, "are you going to answer me?"

He had to think for a moment or two and try to remember her question. Then a small half smile crept over his face and his eyes began to twinkle.

"New Year's Resolution," he answered succinctly.

Catherine looked at him, puzzled, "But it's not New Year's for another two days?"

"This just seemed the right time to follow my instincts," he replied.

Chuckling, Catherine moved back up beside him. Lowering her head, she ran her tongue over and around his nearest nipple, smiling at the effect it had on him.

"Instincts are a wonderful thing," she assured him and moving back under the covers she proceeded to follow some of her own.

Sliding down the bed, feeling like a melted puddle of ice, Gil moaned in his throat at what her attentions were doing to him and thought that maybe just this once his New Year's Resolution had been spot on.

THE END