Oh damn it. She saw me look up. Okay, if I look down really quickly, maybe it'll look like I was just staring off into space. Alright, so far so good. Shit, she's smiling at me. I can see her through the corner of my eye. She did know I looked up. Great, now we've passed each other and I did nothing. She probably thought I was ignoring her... yet again. I know she's felt like I've been ignoring her lately, she's been acting like she's feeling neglected. Especially since she came back to night shift. I can't look at her when she smiles at me though, I can hardly look at her at all without thinking about that night.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

So you sailed away
Into a gray sky morning.
Now I'm here to stay.
Love can be so boring.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I know it was 15 years ago, and probably meant nothing to her, but it meant a lot to me, and it's incredibly hard to forget. I remember every detail. Eddie was out, thought Cath was working. But she wasn't. And neither was I, and she figured she'd do something productive on her night off with Eddie gone. Well, what we did wasn't exactly productive, but I quite enjoyed it.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Nothing's quite the same now.
I just say your name now.
But it's not so bad.
You're only the best I ever had.
Don't want me back.
You're just the best I ever had.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

She called me asking if I could help her paint the bedroom. It's difficult to be in a bedroom with Catherine without wanting to throw her down on the bed and cover her with kisses. I accidentally got some paint on her, she thought I threw it at her. Of course, she hit me right on the face with a big glob of white paint as revenge. So begins the paint war of 1991. After a bit of tossing it at each other, we ended up in a compromising position.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

So you stole my world.
Now I'm just a phony.
Remembering the girl
Leaves me down and lonely.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Without thinking, I pinned her down to the ground and was hovering on top of her. I don't think saying no even crossed our minds at that moment, it happened so fast, it was over before it began. Clothes came off so fast, I swear we were trying to break the world record for how fast you can have sex with another person. We just may have succeeded too, and it got pretty rough. I never thought having sex covered in paint would be all that appealing, but it definitely added to the sexuality factor. Well, until she got paint in her mouth. I thought it was pretty funny. She begged to differ.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Well send it in a letter.
Make yourself feel better.
But it's not so bad.
You're only the best I ever had.
Don't want me back.
You're just the best I ever had.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It was strict passion in the bedroom, then we moved into the shower. Then things got a little more personal for me. I think that was the moment I fell in love with her, in that shower. It must be a sin to share such intimacy as we did at that moment. If it is, I'm sure going to hell. We were getting ready to go again back in the bedroom but Eddie came home. I think I broke 2 world records that night. One for fastest 2 people can have sex and another for how quickly you can put your clothes on and jump out a window. I still have the scar on my leg from that rose bush outside.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

And it might take some time to patch me up inside.
But I can't take it so I run away and hide.
I might find in time that you were always right.
You were always right.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I think Catherine may have told Eddie what we did. He always accused us of having something between us. I never denied it, I didn't know what Catherine wanted me to do. She never spoke to me about what happened after that night. Never even a brief mention. We completely acted like it didn't happen. I went along with it, I didn't think she wanted to remember. After how much she despised Eddie for cheating on her, I figure she hated people who cheated on their spouses. So I figured she hated herself for what happened that night and I didn't feel the need to open any old wounds and make her feel worse.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

So you sailed away
Into a gray sky morning.
Now I'm here to stay.
Love can be so boring

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

She divorced him, and then he died, so why do I still not dare mention that night? I guess you could say I'm a coward. I'm scared to death of rejection. Our friendship has evolved so much since that hot, summer night in June. If I mention it, things will probably just be awkward between us. Things already haven't been the best, cause as I said, she seems to think I'm ignoring her. I don't need to scare her off by telling her the feelings I have for her. I've made it this far without her, I can keep it up. I'd rather have her here platonically that not have her here at all.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Was it what you wanted?
Could it be I'm haunted?
But it's not so bad.
You're only the best I ever had.
Don't want me back.
You're just the best I ever had.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

But one thing is for sure. She's the best I've ever had.

The End.