He was peacefully asleep, his heart full. Something inside him was troubled, though. He rolled from lying flat on his back, his normal sleeping position, to his left side to snuggle up to Catherine. Instead of finding her waist to protectively and lovingly drape his arm across, he found her legs. She was sitting up. He sat up and their eyes met. She was sobbing silently. His heart broke. He reached out to pull her to him. It hurt him deeply when she avoided his embrace.

"Cath? You OK?"

"Do I look OK?" she said, agitated and embarrassed.

"What's wrong?" he asked. "I'm here and I want to help. Was it a nightmare?"

"No... I'm fine."

He scolded her with a look in his eyes, telling her he didn't believe her. "I can't do anything about it unless you talk to me... No more secrets, remember?"

She sighed deeply. "Just leave... Go... I can't stand it..."

He was shocked to the very marrow of his bones. He had no idea what she meant or where this was coming from. He was stunned and frightened. "What on Earth are you talking about? Why would I leave? What is this ..? ... I would nev..."

"Stop it... Of course you will... Everyone leaves me or dies- learns to hate me, abuses me..." she interrupted in a growl. "My God, Gil... My mother hated me because I was a constant reminder of her biggest and worst mistake... The man who raised me hated me because he knew... That's why they kicked me out when I was 17.... My one and only female friend was murdered and someone I trusted was in on framing a guy for her death... And, well, we know MY biggest mistake and what that bastard did to me... My 'father' is a murderer and he thinks money can solve all his problems... Lindsey will grow up and learn about who I was and her "wonderful", loving family and leave me and hate me... You'll wake up one day and not put on those rose-colored glasses sitting there on the night stand and leave because you'll finally see the real me..."

He simply stared at her and tried to make sense of what she was saying. "I see the real you. Why would...?"

"Oh, please..." she sighed, rolling her swollen blue-green eyes. "If you really saw the real me, you'd run away like everyone else in my life has. They were the smart ones... You'll be happier if you leave..." she said hesitantly, as if she expected him to jump up and do just that.

He broke out into hysterical laughter. He flopped back on his pillow and the look in her eyes only fueled his fire. He reached up and pulled her down on top of him. He held her close and tightened his embrace when she began to struggle. Their eyes met for a few moments and she began to cry harder. She relaxed completely against him and buried her head in his shoulder. He felt her shaking and her heart racing. He began stroking her reddish-blonde hair and sculptured back. "Cath, stop... Calm down... I'm not going anywhere- ever... What's got you so upset?"

"YOU COULD HAVE BEEN KILLED TODAY!!" she wailed.

So that was it. "Yes, and so could you..." he began, keeping his voice calm.

"You say you love me... You have a very funny way of showing it," she interrupted, scoffing. "Making me watch you die in front of my eyes while you take bullets for me."

"Cath, it's over, we're OK... I was frightened, too... I would give my life for you as I know you would for me... You killed a man to save my life... When Paul Millander was around, you did everything to keep me safe and you worried, I know you did... You fought hard and rescued me from that Leda woman... You were there for me when I had my surgery..."

"You physically risk your life to protect me and you risk your job for me when I screw things up... You believe in me and trust me and love me..." she rattled.

"Always, my dear," he said, trying to make her focus by taking her face in his warm, gentle hands. He forced her eyes to met his. With tenderness beyond words, he ran his thumbs over her high cheekbones, wiping away her tears.

"I couldn't live without you..."

"I couldn't live without you either," he smiled, "What's more, I wouldn't want to live without you..."

She sniffled. "You are a brilliant man and you have changed- you'd be fine..."

"I've changed because of you, FOR you. You are the biggest and the best part of me...You have given me strength... Losing you would be like having my heart ripped out and I would forget how to breathe - therefore, I would die." She looked at him as if he were crazy. "So basically I put my ass on the line for you for selfish reasons," he shrugged nonchalantly. She giggled.