'*Breathe*,' I remind myself, swallowing. ' *Breathe*.'

* *

She doesn't know how beautiful she is right now; there's no way she can know what it does to me to have her here.

In my bed.

In my arms, her body wrapped around mine in the most intimate way possible.

There's no way she can know how long I've waited for this, how scared I've been that it would never happen.

She smiles now, her eyes burning with a passion ready to be unleashed and I welcome it, finally succumbing to the power she has always held over me.

There is no way I can fight it, and there is no reason I should.

Not now.

Now ever.

My name. My name on her lips, the sound sweeter and more arousing than anything else I can ever hope to hear in this life.

She holds on tight to me, her nails piercing the skin on my back as it happens.

She is beautiful. Gorgeous. Her soul is glowing, and I kiss her.

We melt together as our surroundings blur out of focus.

And then it's over.

Too soon.

All too soon.

The room comes back into focus, and I am aware suddenly of the sounds of our mingled breaths.

She stays inside my embrace, and I hold her close. My words of reassurance only make her tears run faster, and I have never felt more helpless in my life.

"Catherine," I try, kissing her softly. "What's wrong? Look at me."

She does, the passion I saw in her eyes so recently have been replaced with a sorrow so deep I am unsure that I will ever manage to erase it.

Still, I will try.

I must.

Or she will slip away.

I would not survive that.

"Gil …"

So soft, so melodious. So feminine. I adore her voice.

I adore her. It's that simple.

"Yes?"

I touch her face, brushing away the curls that have fallen into her eyes.

She has never looked at me quite like this before.

The vulnerability is palpable.

"I'm leaving."

Three words.

Who knew it would take only three words to bring down my entire world?

Such simple words.

So devastating.

She is looking at me now, the feeling of her eyes on my face is painful.

"Gil, please … say something …"

She is pleading. Catherine never pleads with anyone, least of all me.

It doesn't make sense. What does it matter what I say?

She has made up her mind; the decision was made before she came here tonight.

I see it so clearly now, and I don't move as she untangles her from my arms.

She is waiting for me to speak, but I can't.

I can't even breathe.

[-*tbc*-]