During the fifteen minutes it took him to drive from Catherine's house to his townhouse, Grissom could only think about the embarrassment he had gone through. He made a fool of himself, telling her about his feelings. In his mind, he had the right to blame her for the situation they would find themselves in now, as she had been the one to push for "honesty" and getting things out in the open. But, somehow, he couldn't do that. He easily remembered various moments when she had made a comment that left room for the subject of them, yet he had always ignored those openings. And now, he had decided on taking a chance, hoping to God the fact that she had been eager to confront their sexual tension meant something to her as well. Apparently, it had only proved that his feelings for her were much stronger than hers.

As if on autopilot, Grissom parked his Denali and got out. Walking into his home and shutting the door without securely locking it, he dropped his car keys on the coffee table and headed for the refrigerator. Scanning over its contents, he settled on a water bottle and poured the liquid in a glass ­ he couldn't even get himself to drink the scotch that would be expected. Setting the glass on the counter, he then proceeded to the bathroom, where he stood in front of the mirror above the sink just staring at his tired reflection. Thoughts about how he let it all escalate to this point crossed his mind, but he quickly opened the tap and splashed water on his face, hoping that he would wash his worries away, together with the dirt and tiredness.

He walked back into his living room feeling a little more refreshed but no less depressed. Immediately he froze, surprised to find Catherine there, as she turned around to look at him after closing his front door.

"What are you doing here?" He asked, in a dry whisper that did not seclude the deep hurt he felt.

Ignoring his tone, she confidently took one step forward. "Will you let me talk now?" She replied, as she looked defiantly into his eyes.

***********************************************

*22 minutes earlier*

Catherine had been seated on her couch, in a completely dark living room, absolutely on her own, trying to figure out how she could have let things get so out of hand. She had just let Gil leave. No objections, no moves, no nothing; just plain catatonia.

In a trance, she couldn't hear, see or feel anything; and like that she had stayed for minutes, until a gentle yet insistent poking on her left shoulder got her attention. Then a hand waving in front of her came into view. And, finally, she could hear her mother's voice softly calling her name.

"Catherine? Catherine?"

Even though she could hear, see and feel now, she hadn't still moved. She couldn't bring herself to do it. Reality would hurt too much. She managed to spot the clock on the wall behind her mother; she definitely had been sitting there staring into nothing for at least ten minutes.

In one swift motion, she got up. Startled, her mother asked her what had happened, what her daughter was doing. Catherine didn't even bother to reply. She had to do something. She had to do it. And she had to do it now. She had already wasted too much time.

***********************************************

Watching Grissom stare into her eyes, Catherine could understand her love for him. But she couldn't understand what they were doing, why they were risking everything now. She was a brave woman, but she had gotten used to being friends. It was more comfortable, it was safer. Was it better?

"You have all the right to talk, Catherine." Grissom told her, his eyes never leaving hers. "And I obviously can't stop you from doing it." Then watching her take a deep breath to start her explanation, he spoke in a voice so hurt he hadn't even known he could feel that bad. "I just don't have to listen to you."

Desperate not knowing how to make him stay, Catherine could only watch him turn away from her. Again. But this time, she would do something; she would do anything as long as it made him stay. And she voiced exactly what she was feeling. "You have no right to walk out on me!"

Gil turned back to her, staring at her with passionate yet wounded eyes. "I've been around for over a decade, Catherine. I've seen you date a lot of men, I've seen Eddie treat you in a way no man should treat any woman, especially you. And I've seen you let it happen, until it gets to the point you get deeply hurt. And now you come and tell me I have no right to walk out on you? Pardon me, but I hurt more than you do with every failed relationship you have." He said, unusually unnerved.

"That's not possible!" She said in a loud voice.

"It is!" He shouted, surprising her.

"Why?!" Her shout was even louder, hurting both her ears and his.

He took a breath to calm himself and then proceeded in his normal low tone of voice. "Because every time you got hurt, I hurt for you. I felt your pain. And I could do nothing for you. I hoped you could find someone to make you happy, because that would take away that feeling in my heart, the one that made me - still makes me - believe I could be the man for you. And the reason I have avoided coming up to you and offering you that is not fear that I'm not good enough. It's exactly what happened in your house - rejection."

"I never rejected you."

"You hesitated. Same difference." He told her, pain in his eyes.

Catherine had never seen Gil Grissom so vulnerable before. It broke her heart to know that she was the one responsible for his hurt. "Gil..."

"I can't deal with this now, please close the door on your way out." He started to go into his bedroom.

"I love you too." She told him, stopping him in his tracks. "I hope you know that."

He didn't turn to look at her, but spoke up. "When you're ready for it, to accept my love for you with no hesitation, come look for me." He went in his bedroom, but before he could close the door her voice once again stopped him. He was paralyzed by her unexpected confession.

TBC